The Talking Traveller

Not more than a fortnight ago I celebrated my 26th year of existence. It was celebrated on the roof of a building in a foreign country with new found friends that I have made since my stay here. We had a BBQ and afterwards I had my first and last visit to a late-night club in the city (not my scene y’all). I received my most eccentric birthday present yet in the form of a very alive crab. Yes, a six legged one fresh from the sea. It voluntarily hibernated in my fridge for half a day before I boiled it to a light pink color and then together with my roommate enjoyed its crabby taste.

My last month and a half has been filled with growth in a multitude of dimensions. The most obvious to anyone who will lay an eye on me would be the unusual abundance of facial hair around mouth and chin area. My Chinese vocabulary and grammar knowledge has expanded due to my night classes at a university. This has enabled me to engage in a few simple conversations on the street where some laughter, confusion, and a certain amount of understanding was produced. I am totally fascinated by the Chinese Language and in particular their writing system. I am currently devoting a big amount of my time in studying this and, although very hard, I enjoy the immediate results I achieve from 5 minutes of study when I recognize a character on a sign post, in a magazine or on TV.

I still continually challenge my speech by, as previous stated, attending Chinese class at a university. As it is a language class there is a fair amount of speaking involved. It is a challenging scenario as many of my old fears and memories from High-school and previous varsity atmosphere triggers me to block. Although I do often struggle upholding perfect technique, I do not hold back in speaking, asking questions or making comments(or jokes!) . And I am proud of that. The fun and excitement of the class completely overwhelms the silly amount of fear that is trying to get into my system.

My teaching skill has also grown and I’m enjoying it more and more everyday. I have nearly 25 hours of teaching every week now, and I find that I am becoming less and less conscious that I am a person recovering from stammering when I teach. I am working to carry this feeling/skill over to more social situations also. I still have much work to do in non-teaching (one-to-one) speaking situations. I haven’t made serious contacts in a long time but will continue to count again when the time comes.

Through all this physical, intellectual and psychological growth I have grown a belief that I would like to share with all chronic, recovering and out-of-control PWS (people who stammer) out there.

No, you cannot ignore your stammer, that will be stupid. But please realize that you are much more than your stammer, don’t let your stammer overgrow the beautiful person that is inside of you. You have a responsibility to share who you really are with other people, “you cannot grow in isolation” ( quote from Bruce Lee). Do this, work hard, work smart, and I believe, yes I BELIEVE, that the stammer will grow old, grow bored and die.

TT